In 1997, I had the privilege of hearing don Miguel Ruiz speak for the first time at a small gathering in Tulsa. At that time, he was not yet the bestselling author he is today, but his teachings were already profound.
Council Oak Books had just published Beyond Fear: A Toltec Guide to Freedom and Love, and Amber Allen had published The Four Agreements, but neither book had sold more than a couple thousand copies. Instead of a signing, a small group of less than 20 people gathered to hear don Miguel’s teachings.
Don Miguel, a short man with a big smile and a thick Spanish accent, shared an idea that was both simple and confounding. He explained that everything in existence is a manifestation of God and that the material world is a mirror. This “world of illusion,” or the Dream, is like smoke that prevents us from seeing our true selves, which are pure love and light.
The core of his teaching was this: every person we encounter acts as a mirror, reflecting something we need to see within ourselves. It took me six years, while editing his book, to truly grasp this idea and begin applying it to my own life.
This mirror metaphor is a universal concept referenced by many teachers. Some call it the “funhouse mirror,” where we reach a point in our personal development where our perceptions become distorted.
Much like a funhouse mirror that makes things appear exaggerated, our worldview can become warped, showing us illusions meant to point us toward a place we need to heal. If we accept this, we take personal responsibility and stop seeing ourselves as victims.
When we interact with others, we remember they are also contending with their own “great smokey mirrors.” Our reflections can serve each other, helping us grow beyond strife.
The Great Smokey Mirror is a challenging idea to apply, but if the world is a reflection of our inner state, then we also have the power to change our inner world, which, in turn, will forever change our perception of the world.
When I first began to work as a freelance editor, a significant portion of my income came from week-long writer’s immersions with clients. It was a time of immense learning, and I discovered that my role was to help writers overcome any resistance that prevented them from effectively communicating their thoughts.
During one of these sessions, I worked with a singer and first-time writer. She had a crippling lack of confidence in her writing, second-guessing every sentence. Yet when she practiced her music, she lit up the room. Her confidence as a performer was light years from her hesitant self as a writer.
I had an idea. We began videotaping her as she spoke about her book’s content. This was a breakthrough, as she loved being on camera. This practice helped her begin to uncover her voice as a writer. On the final day, I asked her to sing her song, a cappella, one more time.
I gave her a mirror and told her to sing while looking at her own reflection and replace the word “him” with “me.” The song was from Jesus Christ Superstar. Her eyes filled with tears as she sang, “I don’t know how to love ME.”
The hardest thing to do is self-love. But self-love is the source of all confidence. When we reconcile with ourselves and shine “love me” out into the universe, our lives transform. The distortions in the funhouse mirror vanish, and new experiences arrive like gifts from the universe!
Have you ever looked into your own eyes and felt love for you?
Stop for a moment. Grab a mirror and find Frank Sinatra’s song, “Around the World.” As you listen, replace “you” with “me” or “I.” It’s a simple, profound experience that has the power to transform your world.
“Around the world I’ve searched for ME.”
Remember, the truest love begins when you recognize the face of God in your own reflection.
