We all know that just as there are words that uplift and enthrall us, there are words that can hurt and demean us. But did you know that there is one four-letter word that actually kills?
It’s the word “can’t.” The word “can’t” kills dreams, hopes, aspirations, opportunities, love—the list goes on. “Can’t” puts a stop, an immediate end, to all effort, to all forward movement.
“I can’t do that.” “I can’t go there.” “I can’t attract a mate/make friends.” “I can’t get a job/promotion/raise/better position.” “I can’t act/sing/dance/run/play the guitar.” You fill in the blank. We all have had “can’ts” in our lives, always to our detriment.
What would have happened to Jennifer Bricker if she’d bought into the word “can’t”? At 11 years of age, Jennifer placed fourth in power tumbling in the AAU Junior Olympics, and at 22, was a featured performer on The Circus Starring Britney Spears tour.
Before you shrug and ask, “What’s the big deal about that?” let me add that Jennifer was born without legs. You read that right. No legs.
Jennifer became an award-winning gymnast using her behind, hips, and arms. She also played baseball and basketball in high school without the benefit of prosthetics or a wheelchair and was the first high school tumbling champion with a disability in the entire state of Illinois.
What led to these remarkable feats? Adoptive parents who simply did not allow Jennifer to use the word “can’t.” Ever. Nor did they. Her adoptive parents supported and encouraged Jennifer in whatever she decided to pursue. Her mantra learned early on was “I can.”
Get rid of “can’t.” Try it. Eliminate the word “can’t” from your vocabulary and watch what happens.
You can substitute the word “won’t” or the phrase “don’t want to.” Both “won’t” and “don’t want to” imply that you’ve made a conscious choice about the matter. That it’s a matter of personal preference, not a factual impossibility.
This opens up all sorts of new possibilities. If you say “I won’t get that job I really want,” it invariably begs the question, “Well, why not?” This now requires you to take a closer look at why you think you won’t get it, which can more easily lead to reasons why you could get it.
Don’t kill your dreams. You deserve better than that. Eliminate the killer word “can’t” from your mind and heart, and watch your life soar with the power of “I can!”
