The Flowing Cycle of Giving and Receiving (What I Learned Cleaning out My Friend’s Closet)

BY Stefanie Fields        July 1, 2019

I have this friend, Danielle.  She’s beautiful, vibrant, and full of life.  And she gets more free stuff than anyone I know.

Danielle is the grateful and surprised recipient of so many nice things, time and time again. “I’m so blessed!” she says, delighted by the “random” good fortune. She’s received brand new clothes, furniture, a flat-screen tv, a refrigerator… She doesn’t know why it happens, but from a friend’s eye view it’s beautifully obvious: She keeps getting blessed because she keeps blessing others.

Over the summer Danielle invited me to her house to help sort out her closet.  It was full of nice clothes; hanger after hanger of high-quality, well-made, practically new garments (some even had the original tags). Dresses, blouses, blazers, and such fabulous shoes.  “Why aren’t we the same size?!” I jokingly complained.

Since transferring her designer lot over to me wasn’t an option, I presumed we would be listing it for sale.  Danielle could easily sell those items for some sweet cash, but instead she wanted to donate them. She told me she got most of the clothes for free anyway and didn’t feel right about turning a profit. I understood the logic, but also know that cash is cash, and we were standing in a closet full of it.  But this isn’t how things work when you’re a professional blessing manifestor like Danielle.

Last year someone gave Danielle and her husband – for free – a leather sofa worth $3,000. After their son was born, they needed something a bit more practical so she listed the sofa for sale at a very reasonable price. When the family arrived for pick up, she declined their money. “You can just have it. It was given to me so I’m going to give it to you.”  That family was, of course, completely surprised and tremendously grateful.  And Danielle, naturally, thought nothing of it.

Guess what happened next? She got free stuff again! Just a few weeks after giving away the $3,000 sofa, a big box of high heels and fancy sandals arrived in the mail from her aunt in New York. Brand new, totally stylish, all Danielle’s size.

“I’m so blessed!” she said as she fashion-showed her new shoes across the kitchen.  It’s adorable to me that she can easily see all of her receiving and yet doesn’t seem to catch any of her giving.  Danielle has created this gorgeous, reciprocating cycle – what she receives is simply the reply from what she gives.  And this can be true for anyone.

So there we were, standing in her closet of super nice clothes, sorting what to keep and what to donate. Just two piles, not three.  Even though she could use the money, she chooses not to receive it that way.  Instead she just steps into the flow of the beautiful blessing cycle she’s not even aware of.

I was inspired. Prior to our clean-out day, I’d been painstakingly trying to sell clothes from my own overcrowded closet.  I was taking pictures, posting ads online, dealing with rude buyers, constant pick-up cancellations and no-shows. And for what?  To make $8 on that blouse?  $5 for that skirt?  Then it hit me – this isn’t how a wealthy person behaves! This isn’t showing the Universe that I’m confident in the direction I’m going and trust the abundance will come! This is ridiculous!

So I deleted all my seller ads, packed everything in a bag, and brought it to a wonderful organization that gives nice, clean clothes to people who are struggling.  The clothes are offered to help them get back on their feet; be it a new outfit to wear to an interview or business attire for their new job.  These women need these clothes more than I need $8.  It’s just that simple.

They say if you want to clean up your life, clean out your closet.  It’s true.  And you just might find that by clearing out an old wardrobe, you’ll end up clearing out an old mindset too.

If you clear out what doesn’t belong, you’ll make room for what does.  And I think we could all use more room for blessings – especially the kind we give.

Thank you, Danielle, for showing us how it’s done.

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Stefanie Fields

Stefanie Fields is a Certified Hypnotherapist, author, and empowerment advocate residing near Vancouver, BC. She has proudly published four children’s books designed to promote joy, strength, and positive body-image through the power of positive words and affirmations (you can check them out here: If she’s not busy manifesting her dreams or helping others do the same, you can probably find her on the dance floor.

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