When it comes to empowering yourself to optimize the outcomes in your life, one area that tends to get overlooked is being intentional about pausing and checking in with yourself on a regular basis to determine if you are actively manifesting life experiences that light you up and bring out the best in you or if you are just reacting to life or settling.
The pattern of cruising through life on autopilot can develop without you even realizing it. We are talking about repetitively doing the same things you’ve always done without really thinking about them. This also includes failing to ask yourself if you are doing something simply because it’s familiar or because doing so definitively adds to the quality of your life.
The same goes for subconsciously reacting to whatever occurs in life versus being intentional about consciously creating the spectacular and fulfilling reality that you truly desire.
To help ensure that you remain in the driver’s seat of your life, here are two simple yet important questions you’ll benefit from greatly by often asking yourself:
- Does this support my health, peace of mind, or overall well-being?
- Does this amplify the fulfillment, abundance, and/or joy in my life?
This two-question practice will significantly impact the quality of life that you experience and can be applied in a variety of situations including:
- In the heat of the moment, particularly when interacting with others;
- When starting to slip into an unhealthy pattern or habit;
- Before automatically saying yes to an “ask” or an invitation;
- When considering recurring commitments and activities you participate in;
- When evaluating potential opportunities;
- Prior to making important decisions; and
- As you are making routine choices.
Following are two common life occurrences to illustrate how you can effectively apply these powerful questions in your life.
Negative Interpersonal Interactions
Whether it’s a grouchy salesclerk or the jerky person at work, at one time or another we’ve all found ourselves in a situation that’s heading south and emotions have the potential to escalate rather quickly. Rather than adding fuel to the fire, here is a better way to navigate:
- Take a deep calming breath and silently count to 10.
- Next, ask yourself: Does negatively engaging with the person support my peace of mind, health, and well-being; and will doing so amplify the joy, fulfillment, or abundance in my life? The answer is likely NO.
- Refocus your attention on what you do desire for yourself which is peace of mind and to experience a positive day. Doing so will help shift the ego self out of fight mode and help reconnect you back to the logical and rational part of your brain.
- Peacefully disengage yourself from the situation. For example, calmly complete your business at the store and exit or pleasantly tell the person at work that you’ll pick the conversation back up later or that you have to leave to go make a call.
- Intentionally redirect yourself and the quality of your day back to peace and calm.
Recurring Commitments That Have Run Their Course
Whether it’s a weekly group activity or volunteering your time, at some point you may sense that deep down you are feeling unsatisfied, bored, or perhaps like the activity no longer resonates with your present-day life. To gain clarity and determine your best course of action moving forward:
- Ask yourself: Does continuing with the commitment support my well-being, peace of mind, or health; and will doing so truly amplify the fulfillment, joy, or abundance in my life?
- If your answer is partially yes, ask yourself if engaging in the same or similar type of commitment/activity in a different environment would better serve you. If so, appreciate that you are growing and evolving. Honor this growth by finding and engaging in a new commitment that is better aligned.
- If your answer is no, honor that you’ve outgrown this type of commitment/activity and accept that the experience has run its course.
- Convey that you’ve appreciated or enjoyed the opportunity and now it’s time for something new. Or share that you no longer have the bandwidth. Whatever the case, refrain from overexplaining and graciously disengage from the commitment.
Keep in mind that you can apply this two-question practice to situations where you are being asked or invited to do something, when you are considering potential new opportunities, and when you have important decisions to make.
Bringing It All Together
Rather than coasting through life on autopilot doing the same things you’ve always done or subconsciously reacting to what life dishes out, you have the opportunity to develop a practice of regularly checking in with yourself and consciously deciding what responses and courses of action will eventuate in positive, abundant, and fulfilling outcomes.
By regularly asking yourself, “Does this support my health, peace of mind, and overall well-being; and does this amplify the fulfillment, abundance, and/or joy in my life?” and then empowering yourself to act in accordance with what best facilitates your desired results, you take ownership for intentionally creating a thriving life.