Moving on is hard – it’s natural to be afraid of change; even the most adventurous get nervous. But change is needed to live a great life. Sometimes we can control change and sometimes we can’t, but either way we must trust in the universe. Moving on from something is no different. Whether it’s moving on from a relationship, a job, or simply a location, we have to be fully conscious of when it’s time to change our lives for the better. Here are five signs that it may be time to move on.
1. You’re taking it out on others.
Stress can lead you to do crazy things. Your body can only handle so much stress before it affects other areas of your life that have nothing to do with the stress. Maybe you’re not happy how things are going with your job – when you come home you find yourself unable to unwind, and take it out on others. This is bound to happen to everyone at some point in their lives, but if it’s consistent, it may be time to step back and look at the bigger picture.
2. You’ve lost yourself.
Sometimes our focus changes so much, we forget who we were before we began something new. Perhaps you had more time for exercise or simply had a more carefree life. When I was in a toxic relationship, I was constantly worrying and allowing it to eat away every moment of my day. It’s no way to live life. If you find yourself wanting to go back to the “old you,” then it may be time to leave something behind.
3. It’s not the way it used to be.
Change is going to happen, but if it’s for the worse and not for the better, it becomes draining. Moving to a new city creates a sense of excitement – you meet new people and are living in a brand new world, but three years later, it no longer feels that way. You’re burnt out, tired of dealing with the same thing, and feeling trapped. Don’t just tell yourself, “Oh, it’s normal to feel this way, it happens.” Settling only makes things worse and it gets you nowhere. Take a close look at why you’re feeling the way you are.
4. The bad outweighs the good.
We all get defensive, but there’s a difference between getting defensive and using a defense mechanism. If a good friend understands that you’re not happy with your current situation, they may try to give you advice or talk to you about it. But here’s where humans get weird. We start defending ourselves and often contradict the words we just spoke. “Yes, we have trouble in our relationship but that’s because…,” or “Yeah, I’m overworked and underappreciated at my job but…” or “My best friend did something absolutely terrible but she was there for me when…” Why are we saying “but” when we just admitted that we aren’t happy? Don’t get defensive or enter into denial. Go with your gut. Sometimes we’re great at venting our feelings to others, but we’re the ones who aren’t listening.
5. You’ve stopped setting new goals.
Focusing on the present is a beautiful thing, don’t get me wrong, but you also have to be realistic. Setting goals is healthy, rewarding, and gives you something to look forward to. If you’re telling yourself constantly “Please just let me get through this day,” you’re neglecting your future, and in return your happiness. You used to want to marry your significant other, but today you’re simply hoping to have a romantic night without a fight. You used to hope for a promotion, but today you’re praying your boss doesn’t chew your ear off. Never neglect your dreams.
If any of the above points resonate with you, it may be time to make some changes in your life.