Control is an illusion. The more you try to control, the less you get done. Control can often lead to paralysis and a lack of progress. So how do you get things done? You let go.
When you let go of control, something amazing happens—you gain more control than ever before. Surrendering to the universe or some other power might seem scary at first, but when you experience the benefits it becomes addicting. You’ll find that by surrendering to gain more control of your life, everything else falls into place.
Step-by-Step Instructions to Release Control:
Identify the areas of your life where you have been struggling with control. Make a list of all the places where you feel like you are trying too hard and need to let go.
Examine why it is difficult for you to release control in these areas. Go deeper than surface-level answers, such as “I don’t want to fail” or “I’m afraid of what will happen if I don’t take charge.” Ask yourself if there is something from your past that is making it more challenging to surrender in these situations.
Develop a plan on how to move forward without controlling the outcome. Consider how releasing control can help make progress and create meaningful results in the area of concern. Brainstorm creative solutions that are outside the box and look at possible pros and cons of different actions.
Implement your plan! Take small steps towards releasing control and allowing things to unfold naturally instead of forcing them into a certain shape or trajectory. Let go of perfectionism, lower your standards, and try to find joy in the journey without worrying about the destination or result.
Monitor your progress over time and adjust accordingly. Notice when old patterns resurface, remind yourself that it’s okay to let go, and be gentle with yourself as you break out of these habits and build new ones that allow for more ease and flow in life.
Celebrate every success! Reward yourself for mastering new skills by doing something fun that reinforces positive behavior—even if it seems small or insignificant. This will reinforce your focus on letting go, so celebrate it!
My Experience with Surrendering
Wrapping up my experience with surrendering, I can say that it has truly been a life-changing event for me. It’s taught me that to achieve peace and harmony in any given situation, I must relinquish control and allow others to take the reins.
This is especially true when it comes to my marriage and the relationships I have with my children. In these moments when I intentionally let go of my need to be in control, I can feel an immediate sense of relief.
Instead of being at odds with my spouse or feeling overwhelmed by trying to manage every detail of parenting, suddenly everything feels lighter and calmer—like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
Surrendering also encourages me to trust my intuition more than ever before. It helps me realize that there is an unseen wisdom guiding us through our lives—a greater intelligence that knows far better than we do what will lead us down a path of wholeness, contentment, and joy.
With this understanding, I’m able to step back and allow the universe to do its work without interference from me. As a result, I no longer feel anxious about what will happen next or worse yet, try to force outcomes that aren’t meant for me–I simply let go and accept whatever happens as part of life’s divine plan for me.
In addition to providing mental clarity and emotional solace in many ways, surrendering has also allowed me more room for creativity and spontaneity in how I approach things. For example, instead of sticking rigidly to a predetermined course of action like I used to do all the time when trying to stay in control, now I can take risks if it feels right without fearing failure or judgment from others.
By no means am I saying that surrendering is always easy—I often still struggle with anxiety or uncertainty when letting go—but it’s worth all the effort because ultimately it gives way to greater peace of mind and satisfaction with life overall.