10 Things You Need to Let Go of to Experience More Happiness and Joy

BY Danijela Jokic Vaislay        April 12, 2016

1. Staying "busy" all the time

You cannot make any positive change in your life (learn a new skill/language, obtain additional education, lose weight/change your diet, work overtime for an extra income, welcome a romantic partner into your life, etc...) if you are busy all the time. Get rid of "time-eating-worms": start tracking where you are spending time and with whom. Be honest with yourself: what people or activities can you cut-out in order to increase the amount of your available time?

"Lack of direction, not lack of time, is the problem. We all have 24 hour days." - Zig Ziglar

2. Self-criticism in any form, size, or shape

Negative beliefs and thoughts about yourself that you are constantly repeating in your head will not do you any good. It's important to be objective and honest about your behavior and capabilities, but you must not allow self-criticism to start rolling over your confidence and self-esteem.

3. Judgment and gossiping

It's easy to judge others, but we actually don't really know what they are going through in their life and we are not able to see things from their unique perspective. We can never truly know what other people feel deep inside and why they act in certain ways; we can only know our own motives. Instead of wasting time and energy on judgment and criticism or empty gossiping, focus on building your own strengths and enriching your own life.

4. Wishful thinking

Simply wishing that you have a better job, more money, or a more fulfilling life won't make it so! To reach your goals, you have to combine wishful thinking (a.k.a. positive affirmations and creative visualization) with decisive ACTION! Thinking positive is a good thing and it is needed, but you must also invest time, effort, energy, and money into achieving your dreams.

5. Worry

While planning your goals, it's important to consider possible obstacles and ways to deal with them, but living in fear of "what could happen" or "what if" will get you nowhere. Nobody says it's going to be easy, but you have to be strong: one who is afraid to start a battle will never conquer a new territory in life! Very often, the one thing we worry the most about happens (call it Murphy's Law, Law of Attraction, or just Negative Psychology).

"Worry is an interest paid in advance on a debt you may never owe." - Unknown

6. Limiting beliefs

"I'm just a _______ and I can't _______."
"Now is not a good time to _______."
"I am too busy/poor/ _______ to _______."

These are all limiting beliefs that hold us back. There are things in life that you cannot change (like the family you were born to, the environment where you were brought up, your genetics, etc...), but there are things you can change, and if you are honest with yourself you will identify what those are. Shift your focus to the things you can improve, achieve, do, create, and empower with your current resources. Whatever your circumstances in life are right now, you can always make the best of them!

7. Bad spending habits

If you don't take control over your finances, money will start taking control over you (credit card debt, loans, limited choices in life, working overtime, getting stuck in jobs you don't like).

"If you buy things you don't need, soon you will have to sell things you need." - Warren Buffet

8. Waiting for good things to happen

Are you waiting for the "good" things to happen in your life (hoping to become a "sleeper success" story)? If you don't do something (today, this week, this year) to make changes in your life, it is very likely that nothing will change at all. Prince Charming, a Good Fairy who makes your wishes come true, a pot of gold found on the way home... happen in fairy tales, but in real life you have to be your own Good Fairy! It is time for you to start creating magic in your life!

9. Pretending to be something or someone you are not

If the natural order of the Universe wanted us to all be the same, we wouldn't have different fingerprints, retinas, DNA than other people. We would all be "cloned" and "standardized." But we are not. You are special and one of a kind. It is time to stop hiding yourself. It is time that you show who you really are and how special you are.

10. "Someday" plans

Are you waiting for "someday" to start a new exercise routine, learn a new skill or a language, pursue your dream job, or save money for that trip you've been dreaming to take for years? If you keep waiting for someday, that day may never come. If you really want something, make a decision to pursue it today, this week, this year. Ask yourself if what you are doing today is getting you closer to where you want to be tomorrow? Life is too short to keep on waiting for "someday"!

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Danijela Jokic Vaislay

Danijela Jokic Vaislay is a life coach and writer from Europe, currently living in India, helping young women to live their dreams and discover how to infuse more love and happiness into their lives. For more inspiration and tips on happiness, bliss, achieving life goals and dreams visit her website


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